Trump: Jee whiz, I only have my picture taken at the grave site of a fallen soldier with the family. 

Siri: Arlington Cemetery is supposed to be a hallow and secret place like the USS Arizona memorial.

Trump: Hey how would I know? No one told me about it.

 

Siri: Since you're running for President of the United States, do you mind if I ask you a few questions?

Trump: Shoot!

 

Siri: What are the 3 qualifications to run for a President in the US?

Trump: That is easy! 1) Speak English, 2) own a US flag, 3) Eat at Mickey Ds.

Siri: Wrong! The correct answer: 1) Be born in the US, 2) Be 35 years old, and 3) live the last 14 years in the US.

 

Siri: Name the 4 states that have capitals named after US Presidents.

Trump: Are you trying to make me look stupid? You must be a Democrat.

Siri: I am affiliated, 45! The answers are: Jackson, Mississippi, Lincoln, Nebraska, Madison, Wisconsin, and Jefferson City, Missouri.

 

Siri: Name the only US president who served two non-consecutive terms.

Trump: That is not a fair question. You save the snowflake questions for Kamala Harris.

Siri: Stop whining! The answer is Grover Cleveland. 

 

Siri: Name four states in the US whose capital cities start with the same letter as the states themselves.

Trump: Damn Siri, you are harder on me than Meghan Kelly. I have no clue!

Siri: Dover, Delaware, Indianapolis, Indiana, Oklahoma City, Oklahoma and Honolulu, Hawaii

 

Siri: Name one US' Western ally that has no nuclear weapons.

Trump: That is easy! United Kingdom.

Siri: Where did you go to school, sir?

 

Siri: If you live in Puerto Rico, what citizenship do you hold?

Trump: That's easy! Puerto Rican citizenship.

Siri: Nice try! The correct answer is US citizenship.

 

Siri: If you are visiting the city of Helsinki, what country are you in?

Trump: Russia! 

Siri: Too bad you don't live in Russia! The correct answer is Finland.

 

Siri: Why did you fire U.S. Navy Captain Brett Crozier from his post as commanding officer of the coronavirus-infected aircraft carrier USS Theodore Roosevelt then he was reassigned by acting Navy Secretary after a protest by navy leaders?

Trump: No clue!

 

Siri: Did you call wounded soldiers “losers” and “suckers?” 

Trump: That was fake news by Gen. John Kelly.

 

Siri: Did you accuse US soldiers of stealing Iraqi reconstruction money?

Trump: I don't remember.

Siri: Can you name the woman who designed the U.S. flag?
Trump: Stormy Daniels!

Siri: No, you fool! It was Betsy Ross.

 

Siri: Did you as President mock the Muslim Gold Star family whose son was killed in Iraq in a suicide bombing?

Trump: I plead the fifth!

 

Siri: Did you apologize to Muslims for falsely claiming on 21 November 2015 that you witnessed footage on television of a large crowd of Muslims in New Jersey celebrating the September 11th attacks which was debunked by New Jersey police and even ADL?

Trump: Oh well, I must have been dreaming then.

 

Siri: Why did you lie two days after the 9/11 attack that you rushed to Ground Zero with hundreds of workers that you paid off your own pockets to help find and identify victims when Factchecker found no evidence that you helped with 9/11?

Trump: Siri, that was not on the list of questions!

 

You falsely claimed that you witnessed people jumping out of the Twin Towers on 9/11 from the view in your apartment at the Trump Tower, which is four miles from where the World Trade Center was, then later she refused an interview to explain how you could have seen the victims from four miles away.

Trum: I plead the fifth on this one.

 

Siri: Why did you make bigoted remarks and refer to three US lawmakers (Ilhan Omar, Rashida Tlaib, and AOC) as foreigners, when two of them were US-born citizens? Did you apologize to them or to America?

Trump: That is fake news and my words were twisted.

 

Siri: According to the 9/11 Commission report, none of the so-called 19 hijackers had wives, girlfriends, or family members in the United States during the days or months leading up to the hijackings, yet you stated that "the wives of the 9/11 hijackers knew exactly what was happening" and went back to Saudi Arabia two days before the attacks to watch their husbands on television flying the planes." Did you retract your statement or issue an apology for your big fat lie?

 

Trump: Siri, you start pissing me off with your hard-hitting questions and I don't feel comfortable!

 

Siri: Did you say on camera that the late Sen. John McCain who was held in a prison camp for 5 years was “not a war hero?"

Trump: That was a joke!

 

Did you as a Commander-in-Chief insult the wife of a black soldier killed in Niger by telling the widow that he "knew what he was getting into?" 

 

Siri: Did you as President consider the dismissal of the report by U.S. intel agencies that had determined Russia had paid the Taliban 'bounties' to kill American soldiers in Afghanistan as a dereliction of duty?

Trump: I hate you, Siri! You must be a Palestinian.